I'll have what she's having

Have you ever been in the situation that there is something you want and need so badly, but it's just not coming to you? 

When we don’t get what we want, it’s easy to look others and say:

"If I could just get what she's having, then I would be or feel..." 

and maybe even believe that her life is easier than yours!

This, for sure, creates more worry, frustration, and anxiety, especially when comparison makes us feel bad about ourselves and inadequate, while the others seem to be living the time of their life and making things happen so easily. 

Comparison kills clarity (and confidence)

Other people's successes easily lead us to the wrong direction. It’s easy to close the eyes from what does it require to get there.

It is a survivorship bias, and it's leading deeper into the hopelessness, as we see the other's successes only on the surface and have no idea what they have gone through to get there. 

It's like a self-help book that gives you guidance of how to do things perfectly right but still it doesn't make you taking action and do and experience it in practice.

There is an endless amount of guidance, inspiration, and self-help books that are showing the right path that takes us to desired goals but in the end, it leaves us so very lonely, as there is a gap in between the idea and the goal: what is wanted and how to get there.

I went through all this felt when I started coaching and working for myself. The change was huge after working for corporates for a long time and then suddenly, I was being responsible only for myself, living in total uncertainty and having no idea how to get forward from there. It was lonely and all my patterns and blocks alarmed and change resistance wanted to stop me. 

My main problem? I had no CLARITY OF what I was doing. 

I threw myself in the worst situation without thinking and planning. I didn't do the work and be specific of:

1) what I was aiming to do
2) how I would get there
3) what if it wouldn’t work out (considering the risks) 

And I focused on the outcome, not the path. Plus I'm multi-passionate and that can cause a lot of distractions if you are not extra clear where you want to go. 

I’m not talking about plan B’s or negative expectations but more likely being a bit more realistic and following up if my plans and things started developing to the right direction. 

People said it should be easy to build a business and income for myself, as I had been in business for over 12 years. Well, it is not that simple - I did completely different work and it changes things a lot when you work for others and when you work for yourself.   

I carried on I was determined and I trusted my inner voice and calling - aNd I had made my commitments.

When I started the second part of this life (that's how I call it), I had promised myself to do anything to find out if it would be possible to be happy every day (it is, no matter the challenges!).

And I wanted to live meaningful life more than let my limiting fears lead it and I was ready to get over never ending thresholds that everyone must face - whatever they do.

Books and self-study programs rarely solve the deep unconscious patterns and personal barriers that keep people standing in their own way and when this goes on for while, it makes them believe they are not good enough, talented enough or smart enough to do what they want as the change also resists itself. 

Too many give up when there are obstacles and inner resistance that feels like you would be are standing in your own way. It's easy to stop believing when it feels lonely and difficult when there is no one to give the right answers. 

Too many are attracted by golden shiny objects without remembering that we can choose our struggles but we can't avoid our struggles - no matter what we do for work.

Choose and be clear of what you are having

You know everything you need to know - it’s there even if you don’t recognize it now. The better you know yourself, your desires and your genius, the easier it is.

By the way, success and failure are not that far from each other: "When failure becomes invisible, the difference between failure and success may also become invisible." (you are not so smart.com)

Now I want to hear from you: how has this been for you? How did you find your authentic success? What did you have to learn before it happened?

If you like this blog share with your friends! You can also join my newsletter here - when you SIGN UP you will get an ultimate confidence boosting transformational audio (which is so relaxing and helping you to get where you want to go). 

Love,
Jenni

10 tips for better sleep (and health and wellness)

We all know how important sleep is for our well-being. Lack of sleep affects the mind, happiness, and weight and can cause all kind of side-symptoms.

People who suffer from insomnia are ready to do anything to get some sleep, I know that from my own experience. Years ago I suffered from insomnia and I know all about the horrors it can cause. In the end, when I took the responsibility of it, I used all these methods to create new evening routines and balance my distracted mind and create a new mindset about sleeping.

10 tips for better sleep

1. Create healthy evening routines. Adults need routines as well. What are your evening routines? Is it serving your sleeping? Modify your routines, if needed and follow them even while you are traveling and on the weekends. Reserve enough time for your sleeping routines in the evenings.

2. An hour before bedtime: no social media, internet, games - switch off all the gadgets. No work related reading either but something empowering and positive. TV doesn't belong in the bedroom: it makes your sleep worse and keeps your brain up and running all night. It doesn't remove the stressful thoughts but just distracts your mind other ways. What to do instead? Journal, read, just relax, draw, stretch, meditate or be present and have a conversation with your family.

3. Set your alarm early in the evening. So that you don't need to think about it just before bedtime.

4. Write your worry list & work through your thoughts about the day before getting into bed. Don't try to go to bed with stressful thoughts. Write down all the things and thoughts running in your mind - I mean everything including the negative feelings. It helps you to release anxiety that often sneaks in in the middle of the night and then keeps you awake. Remember, what you can't change or affect is not useful worry about. Don't carry the baggage you can't release.

5. Keep your bedroom dark, quiet and cool. Dark blue is a great, calming color.

6. Cut off caffeine already on the afternoon (tea, coffee, soda) - it affects to your body. Switch to decaf coffee and tea.

7. Cut off alcohol: many believe that nightcap or couple of glasses of wine can make it feel easier to fall asleep, but you are more likely to wake up frequently.  And you slowly create a need/addiction with alcohol. If you are ready to explore cut off alcohol for a couple of weeks and you will feel calmer, sleep better and feel more energized.

8. Take deep breathes (meditate). Close your eyes and breathe. Or put your legs up on the wall and just breathe for 5 to 10 minutes. Very calming and tranquilizing, slowing down your system and stress levels.

9. Avoid heavy exercise or heavy meals late in the evening.  

10. If you wake-up in the middle of the night, don't panic - it's fine. Get up, do something calming, reading or meditation and when you feel tired again, go back to bed.

These tips can help to calm down in the evening and release the stress and tension that often disturbs the mind and prevent sleeping. If you suffer from long-term insomnia or if you feel fearful about sleep already in the evening or need to use sleeping aid often or every night, it is good to take it seriously and work things out to avoid more serious issues and exhaustion.

You can learn to sleep again and find new ways to calm yourself down and sleep well again. There are different ways to ease the distracted mind and release insomnia - hypnotherapy is a fast and effective natural therapy method that can help you to learn to sleep again: Read my more here.

If you want to know more could it help for you contact me here.

What do you do in the evenings to make sure you sleep well? 

Sweet dreams!

Much love, JennI

Hypnotherapy cured my insomnia and I learned to sleep again

I asked Jenni to help me with the sleeping problems and insomnia that I had been suffering on and off for over ten years.

I felt desperate as the problem was getting worse no matter I had nothing unusual or stressful going on in my life.

The only help appeared to be getting stronger medicines, and I didn't want that: I just wanted to rest naturally and sleep soundly, as I had done before.

My two-hour hypnotherapy session with Jenni was a deep dive to my mind and past revealing the personal reasons behind insomnia. After the session, I slept throughout the night.  Only one session and the personalized audio she made for me helped me almost magically to sleep again. I was able to change my thinking and release the old beliefs that caused insomnia. I now know that I can affect to my sleeping.

I now sleep most of the nights soundly until the morning. If I sometimes wake up in the middle of the night, I know it is only natural and I'm not getting anxious anymore, but I feel relaxed about it. I am forever grateful for Jenni who helped me to let go of this nightmare and learn how to sleep again.

If you suffer from sleeping problems or a lot of stress and busyness hypnotherapy is a great and fast way to find a solution and release for your issue. The cause of the issues are always personal and hypnotherapy sessions are always personalized for your needs, so sometimes more than one session is needed. Get more information and book your session by email: info@jenniglad.com.  

[read more: work with me]

[more on the blog: 10 tips for better sleep]

How to use visualization and the power of mind

I had a beautiful brunch with my friends yesterday. We were celebrating my upcoming 40th birthday. I feel that I'm stepping in real adult- and womanhood, but at the same time, I feel ageless and good about getting old. Age is just a number and our attitude has a lot to do with how old we feel, and I never want to forget to play, be curious, have fun and try new things out - so what would really change?

Life is not a number, and I will never forget to play, be curious, have fun and try new things out - so what would really change?

Then, my friends were asking me about my visions for the year - what next?

Of course, my friends know that I live what I teach: use vision boards, reminders and different kind of techniques (habits) daily to keep myself happy and aware of where I am going in life - day by day (watch the last week's video of planning and procrastination).

I start my mornings quietly on my yoga mat. I try not to touch my mobile phone before anything else than a cup of coffee. I have all notifications off on my phone, so I don't get distracted (strongly recommended to everyone! Social media, emails and your phone just sucks you into distraction and overwhelm in a second).

My morning habits are part of my life that I don't even think about it anymore and don't want to live without - those moments in the morning time are my time. It sounds organized, but it's not like that at all: I flow with my morning schedules.

I do meditation, journaling, planning, and visualization - which is the IT tool that I talk about in my video below. It's The Secret all those books are all about.

On this video I'm talking about how to use visualization for short-time and long-term desires.

Visualization is simply about creating mental images for the future. It's about using your mind and imagination consciously, which you are doing every day and moment - unconsciously, the mind is fast - and that is how the brain works. It not about pushing through with a great determination towards the goals and forgetting what happens outside that track.

Visualization is a powerful tool helping us keep moving forward, and make things easier, daily life happier and you will become more trustful when you set your visions, define your goals and then - let go and get to that daily planning and life. Go!

To get back to my friends' question - I didn't know what to answer to my friends!

It’s a delicate and sacred thing when to share your dreams and visions publicly. I could have said I want to publish my book (I really do) and all those other things, just to say something. But I couldn't, as I haven't taken the next necessary steps yet. I did a new vision board recently, and now I concentrate on embracing today and feeling grateful of all what I have (the second part of THE secret) and there are many new things that need my focus and energy now - like my birthday celebrations! I have set my visions and I know it will happen - when the time is right.

Have you ever done a vision board? Let me know your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. And if you take my challenge from the video, I definitely want to hear how it goes.

With love, Jenni

Hypnosis helped me to get rid of my sugar addiction

I asked Jenni to help me do a real and long-lasting life change toward a healthier, balanced lifestyle - and especially to get rid of my sugar addiction and food binging.

Sugar addiction made me tired and unmotivated, and my brain was foggy. My blood sugar went up and down, and so did my mood! I was often angry or irritated without knowing the reason, and it made me feel horrible. Strict diets and health programs were working only for a short while, but soon after, I was back to my old habits. I didn't have the willpower to change my habits permanently, and it was a painful struggle! I was disappointed in myself, and there was a lot of self-blame.

After the first session with Jenni, I felt how my brain started dealing with new information, i.e., organizing itself for a new way of thinking and changing behavior. I wanted to listen to my personalized audio every night, and I started feeling more balanced day by day!

In just three weeks time, significant (unbelievable!) changes started to happen; my attitude changed and I felt more compassion and acceptance. My approach toward food changed too in the fact that now, I want to eat clean and healthy food.

I started enjoying meals with all my senses, and I am excited about cooking healthy meals for the family! I do not need to gorge myself anymore. I feel my metabolism has started to run properly; I can visualize the fat cells shrinking, and my weight is steadily decreasing every week.

Chocolate and candy have crossed my mind, but I do not have a compelling need to eat them; they do not interest me anymore. Once I had some candy at the movies, and I was not able to eat it as it tasted way too sweet!

A huge healing process started from inside out. In such a short time I was able to release the old issues that were inducing my self-sabotaging behavior; I understood and very gently accepted why I had to be that way. The past is not affecting me anymore.

I had my second video call after three weeks. Then, we worked with my mindset and boosted my confidence - it was really empowering! The third session was to complete our work together and make a plan how I will keep myself on the right track.

I enjoy myself and my life so much more now, and I see my changes also positively affect the people around me, my family, and the atmosphere in my home. My skin is glowing, and I am full of joy and energy.

Jenni is a gracious and trustworthy therapist and coach who warmly but firmly leads and helps her clients to gently see and let go of issues that can be painful and difficult to face. Transforming my habits was essential for me and affected all areas in my life. I can't thank you enough.

Karoliina, Helsinki

Happiness equals success - video blog

Believe me, there was a time (actually a few decades) when I didn't really like Mondays (or sundays). 

I ruined the half of my weekend thinking about Monday and I felt stressed out about the coming work week.

I often worked on Sunday evenings to make the next week easier. There were always so much to do and I felt like I never got anything finished as there were always something new coming up. Yes, there is a reason why it is called rat race. I kept doing what I thought I should do instead of thinking what I wanted and desired. I chased some kind of gold shiny objects and believed, it would eventually make me happy.

Now when I've been out of the corporate world for five years it's clear why I felt so miserable and anxious then.

I missed the crucial feelings of fulfillment. Stress and busyness had numbed me. My work didn't feel meaningful and work is a crucial part of our lives, as we all know. We need to do what we like.

We need to do what we like.

For a very long time, I believed success create happiness. 

It's a common belief that makes many people miserable. We have learned that we should be rewarded for the hard work and often people sacrifice their own happiness/health/wellness for doing the things they don't even like, but believing happiness is the reward of the hard work and sacrifices.

The big secret is: happiness is a key to success. 

By changing this belief I got clarity and was able to make the exit plan from the business world and started creating the life I truly wanted.

Watch the video and learn what you can do to improve your happiness today:

 

We create change by cultivating the art of presence, making conscious choices, shifting our mindset and making steady, constant improvements towards our goals - that is how you can create a happy life.

I have created a Mindful Living method based on my life-changing tools: seven practical tools for mindful living. Click to get access to this FREE 7-series video course. 

How has it been for you - let me know in the comments below. What does success mean to you? Have you found the balance between success and happiness? How did you make the change?

There is no right answer to these things and I am eager to hear your experience in the comments below :)

Much love, Jenni