creativity

my dreamy, cheese love story on how I manifested my soulmate

*This blog was updated on Dec 17, 2020*

Seven years ago I had a big dream. 

My dream was to find a solid, truthfully loving, kind, and reliable partner. A soulmate.

The one who would be my best friend, my partner in crime and as independent as I am but who would love togetherness as much as I do. 

I had been going through rough life experiences and painful relationships. After losses, separations and painful but helpful realizations, I had been taking responsibility on my wellbeing and happiness in new ways, recovering and healing the wounds consciously.

It felt I was rising from the ashes and was ready to go again. Even I felt timid, and scared sometimes to even think about starting a new relationship. 

In some point I seriously thought about sacrificing my life for humanitarian work, helping others, and living alone as a modern nun! 

At the age of 35, it occasionally sounded like a valid option for me asI had decided I would not satisfy less than meeting the one who felt like he was the one.

I had already jumped out from the corporate world and I was creating a purpose-driven business based on my values, intuition, desires and skills. I wanted nothing more than to find my true passions and do meaningful work. I was researching happiness, psychology, healing methods, and universal laws on how to lead and create life instead of drifting in life. 

I had realized that I had been conspiring my experiences, so I took a full responsibility of my experiences, beliefs and patterns.  

My awareness grew rapidly as I focused on self-healing. My love an appreciation grew exponentially towards life, others- everything. Internally I started feeling free, connected, accepted and more of myself again.  

So much more that I started believing again that there would be someone, somewhere in the world, who was meant for me.

I set the stakes as high as all my new dreams - I determined that I’d rather live alone the rest of my life if I wouldn’t meet The One. 

I didn’t run out to the bars, or speed dates or started hunting anyone. It just didn't feel right, anymore. I allowed myself to "meet someone anywhere anytime" like everyone was saying to me. As I was empowering myself, I started trusting the unknown, my visions, and desires.

As I had already made some big shifts professionally before and had grown my courage to believe it is was possible to create the big leaps and make our desires true. 


I had been able to create and attract good things into my life - my career, my amazing apartment, the way I got out from the business world, the finances, the yoga teacher training in Nicaragua, which was the first step on my professional transition and transformation.

It had all been on my first ever vision board, or little intention notes that I had written. I had used the power of my mind, feelings and intentions to manifest it. 

Through my street-science research, I had learned it was possible to change our lives by shifting our energy, mindset, thoughts and focus - and create a new reality from inside out. 

It was almost overwhelming for me to realize how powerful we really are when there’s healthy self-worth, and we use our free will to make conscious choices by bringing our hearts to it

Things started to flow easily and effortlessly. As I intentionally focused on expanding love in every way every where I went and with everyone with who I interacted. I was bursting love. When I felt sometimes lonely and felt uncertain if it was completely ridiculous, I kept feeling and believing in my future visions.

I knew I was ready to meet someone, I just didn’t know how and what should do I do about it.

I wouldn’t have met my husband without the help of '“invisible forces”, the guidance that I got from the unknown psychic astrologist. One night I saw her ad online and ordered a free reading just for fun.

It changed my life.  

Next day I got an email from her and she was guiding me what I needed to do in order to meet my soulmate. She was urging me not to miss the opportunities that would be available for me shortly in two months.

Do more self-work, release your old beliefs about relationships, she said. And spent more time online, your first encounter will happen on a huge online service. She also said I’d win a large amount of money. 

There was doubt, for sure, as I couldn’t believe it would be possible to have something so good happening to me. But she seemed to know a lot of details about me without knowing anything about me. As I had nothing to lose, I decided to play, have fun, and get myself vulnerably out there.

I had not signed up for any large online dating sites as that didn't feel right either. My ex-boss had started an online dating startup, and she had created an account for me, but there were not that many people. So I didn’t do much more than detoxing my mind and spent more time online. That’s what I did anyway, so I forgot the whole reading! 

One night I logged in and liked the only person’s picture that I somehow liked. I was suspicious and hesitant but followed my intuition.

We started chatting and somehow things started moving forward quickly. I felt so nervous to leave for our first blind date. Because I knew it could be him and my life would change! And at the same time, I was scared what if he would not have been. It was very exciting and terrifying.

We met online in between those specifics dates she wrote about. Exactly like she described; first online on that dating site, then in Facebook and then soon on a blind date.

We lived only a few blocks away from each other. 

Our relationship developed smoothly and quickly, and he turned out to be exactly who I had been looking for. 

This week we celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary, 7 years together.

  • I have learned that communication, listening, and appreciation create the foundation for the relationship - starting from yourself.

  • We can’t either ignore the mirror effect, that repeats in every human relationships: You get what you give and can learn a lot about yourself from what you see.

  • When you change yourself, others will change around you (I have witnessed this multiple times during my marriage) so taking responsibility of our patterns, past and self-work is crucial.

So this is how our dreamy, cheesy, love-story got started.

Since then I have created many more conscious, quantum leaps.

It's called a leap when the desire happens fast, and pretty effortlessly and it's based on clear, heart-based intention. It's not a magic skill, it's simply about the energy and physics that happens automatically when we release the past attachments, connect with the heart-based desires and move towards them with consciously and effortlessly.

We manifest everything, not only good things. It's much more fun to do it intentionally and enjoy the good results while staying present, connected and knowing where you are heading. This is what I call Self-Mastery - the way I live and many, many successful people live it too. 

Learn all about this in practice, how to connect with your real visions passions and to start using these tools, create a life and career you want. The doors to my online mastermind program are open a few more days, read more in here Embody Your Inner Power.

Much love,
Jenni

Facing fears above the clouds

I’m standing on a tiny, two-inch wide cliff on my toes. I hold the Via Ferrata cable with my left hand and trying to find a good grip on the rock wall with the other one. I am totally focused on moving myself forward step by step on the vertical wall and to get on the wider ledge above me. We are climbing via Ferrata and the summit of Tofana di Mezzo. I don’t look down the drop of 650 feet, but I admire the magnificent view from 10,000 feet— the surrounding mountains, the green valleys, the blue sky and the fluffy white clouds that are literally around me.

I see the iron stick that seems to be hanging in the air, which I have to reach with my right foot. I turn my gaze back to the gray mosaic stone. Suddenly the skulking fear gets me, and I loosed my nerve and froze — shit, I lost it.

My mind is quickly getting overwhelmed: I try to find a good grip and my fingers wander nervously. I see the image of myself hanging there by myself on the wall, on a high mountain and having a huge drop below — just like in all those climbing pictures — what am I doing here, I'm doing that stuff!

What if I fall, can I trust the cables, can I trust the via ferrata self-belay kit is working, the umbilical cord as I call it as my life depends on it. I hate this! The fall factor is much higher in via ferratas than in a rock climbing fall. I would get hurt as I would drop at least 30 foot and hit whatever. I can’t fall — all this information occupies my mind.

My legs are shaking visibly, like in the old cartoon movies.

“Breathe Jenni, breathe,” I calm myself down. “You have felt this feeling of panic before, many times in different situations. Pull yourself together. Trust yourself; you got this.”

I called my inner tiger to help me out — this was not a good time for the lazy panda.

Slowly, inch by inch I force myself to move forward, taking steady steps, good grips and I’m climbing on the ledge. I breathe heavily and realize the worst is over.

There were more ladders, narrow paths on the mountain tops, some covered with snow, more cables and fun rock climbing — and after I had faced the fear thoroughly, I managed to enjoy it all. It was a blissful day, no matter we had to climb down and eat snow when we run out of the water, as the ski lift we planned to take down was under maintenance.

When climbing via ferratas, the iron routes at the Dolomites and in some places in the Alps, you get to hike and climb and see places that are usually only for rock climbers or not even for them. I’ve been rock climbing for a couple of years now, mostly inside but I’ve been at the Dolomites before so I kind of knew what to expect. I am lucky my husband is an experienced mountaineer, and I’ve learned a lot from him. Climbing the most challenging ferratas without experience and good planning can be life-threading.

The conditions can get serious up there, and climbing is very different outside. On our first climbing days, I got stiff of the fear and was not able to find the joy and the excitement of the climbing.

“Have I just become that fearful and lost that adventurer in me?” I pondered.

I recognized that itchy feeling of excitement and butterflies in my stomach was familiar for me, which was calling me to go for it. That feeling includes two options: either I go for it, face and get over my fears and challenge myself. It can mean I’d be failing, but I’d learn and experience and create change. Or, I could leave it and approve it was not for me this time. And regret it later.

I had to clarify this all for myself and get insight, so I sat down and had a mini-coaching session with myself:

  • Why am I doing this?

  • What’s behind the fear?

  • Where is that fear coming from?

I remembered (ha!) it had been my dream I had set a few years ago; I had wanted to start climbing and mountaineering.

I’m a nature addict to the bone; that’s my Finnish heritage, and I’ve been skiing since I was four and I love the snow, the forests, and the mountains. I need the nature’s healing and balancing “green power” almost every day; it can be only a walk in the park and sitting on the grass. I enjoy the extreme adrenaline rush and the blissful feeling afterward. And exploring — all of it.

About the fears. I was getting out of my comfort zone big time that I hadn’t done for a while. Climbing these high mountains was new to me. I got stiff of the fear when I read the descriptions of the routes and the grades. I was afraid I would be drained physically, no matter I am in a good physical shape. I was afraid I was not good enough, and brave enough, in front of my hubby’s eyes. I didn’t trust and give myself credits. I noticed I had kind of lost my wilderness and guts.

Fears are supposed to keep us safe, but they are number one reason why we don’t stretch out from the safety zone and follow our desires, big or small.

It’s easy to stay there, satisfy less (and complain) and let the resistance rule. But we all have much more power, the knowledge, the capabilities and skills than we know - we need to challenge ourselves occasionally! New things won’t feel easy at first, not always even enjoyable but when you get over that first phase - bliss is waiting.

I decided to go for it. I relaxed my mind and the body. I called my inner tiger to walk by my side. That powerful, calm animal, who takes it easy when it can and roars when needed.

Quick self-reflection guide (how to handle crisis creatively, get understanding of what you need now and move forward)

When you feel it’s difficult to find answers or make decisions, take responsibility, pick pen and paper and ask yourself:

  • How do you feel (be honest)?

  • What do you need?

  • What do you desire (how do you want it to be)?

  • Who are you (in your heart)?

  • What needs to change?

  • How and where you need to adapt to get there (it’s about you, not others)?

  • Think and ask the questions - get quiet and listen

Pro tip: If you don't find any answers, let it rest for a while - don't try to force, it makes it worse - trust the answer will come and forget it. Be willing to be surprised and open to the new and change things up.

Always with love, Jenni

p.s. if you got interested about via ferratas and climbing in Italy, see this cool video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziRuQIuqN_M

Photo by Joonas Makkonen

One step at a time

ontheroad-e1443817292405.jpg

The whole idea was so outrageous that it was amusing me. I couldn’t even imagine how I could make it happen without miracles. I just thought, "Aha, how interesting." Then I added playfully, "Well, if it is meant to be, show me the way. I promise to follow, I have made my commitments to make this world happier place."

About three years ago I got an idea of the story I would need to write and publish some day. It was not a blog but a full book. The story should be written in English and first published in USA. It was quite challenging idea for a Finnish girl who had only published couple of blogs in Finnish. It was pretty wild idea for a girl who had just started to create her own journey and had consciously stopped adrift in her life. I knew I was not ready for it yet, so I left it to brew and forgot the whole thing.

During that time life had basically forced me to start doing the changes I had secretly dreamt about for years and stubbornly resisted. I didn’t have detailed plan of what exactly I was desiring to achieve but I trusted I would find it along the way. And no, it was not as easy as it sounds: I was about to change my whole life, give up of the external identity I had created along the years and dig out the authentic me and be happier than ever. It was not going to be a one month project.

My aim is still not to encourage people to leave their day job right away and jump to the freezing financial uncertainty, like I ended up doing without a security net or sponsors. No, we all don’t want to or need to do the same things. But I have to say finances will be found when they are needed when you're willing to do the things you have a calling for. Do the easiest and smallest changes – take a course and test drive the ideas. See how it feels and be willing to be open and curious. One step at a time. 

So me, the busy business girl who I had become, started to blog about my journey after I took the first step towards what was truly calling me, and signed up for a yoga teacher training in Nicaragua. All that encouraging support from the family and friends "you have to do what makes you happy" and how everything was organized so smoothly gave me confidence I could lead my life to right direction and my other foot was already out from the office door. I kept affirming: take one step at a time and the next steps will be exposed to you.

When you're driving, you can't you really see what is behind the curve, but you know the road is continuing and it will take you to your destination, so you keep driving.

I wanted to share my journey on the blog and encourage the other people to see it would be possible to do the wanted changes in their life and create the life they truly want live — there were so many overachievers like me struggling with their stressful, unbalanced and unsatisfied lives. I didn’t really want to expose my personal life but the pressure, the beep and the calling was strongly demanding me to write. It is the roar of creativity.

So I wrote almost ten blogs in two weeks time before I left to my training. After I published my first blog and shared it on my Facebook I ran out from the house. I was shaking when I sneaked back to see what people would say and afraid they would they persecute me and think that I’ve gone crazy. But they didn’t. Or none said it out loud to me. One step at a time my confidence as a writer grew.

But the big story, the idea of that book, took a big step ahead sooner than I thought. After two years when I started writing and creating my own path, I wrote the first draft of that book in Bali in Mastin Kipp’s Writers Mastermind retreat and amazing coaches and fellow writers. I had followed his inspirational work for some time and learnt a lot through him. When I saw his post about the retreat I just instinctually knew I had to get there, no matter what. Again in the miraculous ways and again I managed to get everything organized. But not without facing any challenges or fears along the year I waited for that trip.

Remember and feel the original intuition, it will take you somewhere great. I had to step back to that intuitive feeling many times during the year when the suspicious ego wanted to play small and take the control. I have to say, money is not an issue when you are willing to follow your calling. So again I had got everything organized and I traveled to Bali for a month. I had amazing time finalizing my transformation, which was one of the reasons I did the trip. And basically wrote my life to a better one and got the first version of my story done. It is still a work in progress.

Release everything you need to release. Receive everything you need to receive. Be patient.

Last weekend I participated on the Hay House Writer’s workshop in New York and I found my original spark of creativity and to work with my projects. I met amazing people, I need my kind of people and supporting peer group - writing and being self-employed can get lonely. 

I noticed how I had become overwhelmed by all the work I really want to do and create. I had almost lost the motivation as I tried to do and rush too many things at the same time without proper planning, routines and consistency and my goals felt like unreachable chaos — I was pushing on a string. I heard myself priesting to my coaching clients about the patience and how things will happen on time. I stopped to listen my own words and took the advice too. 

I'm still looking for my niche. I'm close but finding it requires releasing of some old habits and beliefs, which then creates space for the new. It needs work, eagerness and courage to test some of the new ideas. Without a doubt there will be many lessons to learn and challenges to tackle that will lift me on the next level.  

I have told to quite for a few people about my dream that Hay House would publish my story. Last weekend I realized I don’t need to worry about the publishing now. I will get my stories out in a way or another. Then when the time is right. There are possibilities, multiple options to publish in this digital world. I understood all I want is to do the work and concentrate to put my message on the paper - then I’ll see where it leads. Lightly, one step at a time.

With love, Jenni

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