Are you sabotaging yourself?

A few years ago I stepped out from my uncomfortable and unsatisfying comfort zone and business career.

I was so excited and pretty much stunned: I was going to do my dream job and work for myself - life felt super good. But when I got out to total uncertainty, I freaked out.

I knew the direction I wanted to go and what I was willing to create; coaching and holistic health business helping people to be happier and make those changes happen. I had done the pre-work, found my desires and had vague plans how to get forward with following my calling.

Suddenly, I was trapped in my apartment, battling with procrastination, anxiety, and stress - and I felt so lonely.

“Now what?” I asked from the white walls.

I just felt stuck and couldn’t get things done or follow my plan. Nevertheless, I worked all the time. It took a while to get over the inner struggle: fears, self-blame, and self-doubt. Stiff beliefs hold me back in front of the huge but tempting uncertainty. In some point, I was seriously pondering going back to the business world as it would have been a safe choice.

In some point, I was seriously pondering going back to the business world as it would have been a safe choice.

Today, I am so happy that I pushed through my fears and kept believing in my visions.

But I need to say; my path could have been so much easier if I could have just allowed myself to ask help and have someone to work with me - there is always a way when there is a will.

That time I didn’t realize that I was missing was a peer group and a mentor, who could have helped me to get things started, have clarity and grow faster to a new way of living. I could have used someone to challenge and encourage me to get over my boundaries and take courage action towards my goals!

I thought I couldn’t afford to hire a coach then and yet I didn’t have the network of like-minded people surrounding me. After a business career and dealing with a big transition, I felt I didn't belong anywhere.

After a business career and dealing with a big transition, I felt I didn't belong anywhere.

No regrets, I learned my lessons:

On that time I suffered from a belief I am not worthy of help. It definitely was a self-love issue. I was used to surviving on my own and making independent decisions since childhood.

I never really learned how to ask help or get support.

Changing my belief system was crucial for my life - it changed everything.

We don’t need to struggle and figure things out on our own. We don’t need to know everything. That’s why other people have something that you or I personally don’t have.

Today I work with different kind of coaches depending what I need. I have someone to help me at home and with the business administration. I take care of my health and use a different kind of practitioners to keep myself healthy and happy.

I have a network of other coaches and professionals that I constantly grow. I have my wise-woman group who give me their unconditional support, wisdom, and love. I've learned to reach out when I need a friend. I know when I need some time off.

All this is a big sign of self-love. Lack of self-love and worthiness is a common issue manifesting all kind diseases and unconscious self-sabotage. Today I can proudly say, with healthy selfishness, that I love and approve of myself as I am. I work with that every day - it will probably never change.

Love, Jenni